her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize