No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize