I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
