any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
She made me pour olive oil on her.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
