she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
