I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
