Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize