Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize