I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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