Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
vagina is talking i cant
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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