You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
