wakey wakey hands off snakey
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
