Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
