And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
