You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
