Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
