So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
