Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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