There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize