Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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