Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
