Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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