he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
