its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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