marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
This is not my ceiling
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Randomize
