There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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