so that wasnt chicken after all
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize