oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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