true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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