Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
