So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
