I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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