in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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