Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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