we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
