White coat. Heels.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
