Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize