The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
