I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Damn victory sex feels great
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
