You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
