i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
God, I missed his penis.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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