She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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