Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
