Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
