first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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