new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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