Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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