we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
