I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize
