We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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