i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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